~ Synopsis ~
I live in a world without magic or miracles. A place where there are no clairvoyants or shapeshifters, no angels or superhuman boys to save you. A place where people die and music disintegrates and things suck. I am pressed so hard against the earth by the weight of reality that some days I wonder how I am still able to lift my feet to walk.
Former piano prodigy Nastya Kashnikov wants two things: to get through high school without anyone learning about her past and to make the boy who took everything from her—her identity, her spirit, her will to live—pay.
Josh Bennett’s story is no secret: every person he loves has been taken from his life until, at seventeen years old, there is no one left. Now all he wants is be left alone and people allow it because when your name is synonymous with death, everyone tends to give you your space.
Everyone except Nastya, the mysterious new girl at school who starts showing up and won’t go away until she’s insinuated herself into every aspect of his life. But the more he gets to know her, the more of an enigma she becomes. As their relationship intensifies and the unanswered questions begin to pile up, he starts to wonder if he will ever learn the secrets she’s been hiding—or if he even wants to.
I know I’m late in the game here, reading this book – it’s been on my TO READ LIST forever – and even now as I write this, I know the review will not do the book justice. I read it back in 2014, probably last summer, but I just downloaded the audiobook and have been propelled back into this story – hard.
Katja Millay wrote a story about a girl…. Nastya, a girl that does not talk. We learn early on that something horrific has happened to her, yet we’re still unsure exactly what. She’s recently moved in with her aunt, is starting a new school – and does not speak. Nastya is taking the whole ubber-slut notion to a whole new level, keeping her distance from all of her peers by wearing the shortest of skirts, tallest of heals and war-paint inspired make up. She’s trying to find a way to function in her new life – one that’s drastically different from her old one…. because as she says…. she’s dead.
It doesn’t take Nastya long to get the attention of Drew….. and Josh. Josh Bennett, a local boy with just as dark a past who finds solace in his wood working – Drew, the mouthy best friend who takes Nastya under his wing and tries to show her a good time – the idea of a good time would be your typical high school experiance – parties, boys – booze…. but Josh see’s a side of Nastya that no one else does. When she runs at night and finds herself at Josh’s house – in his garage and watching him work. These two create a bond – one that Nastya start without even speaking a word.
They help each other heal from the torments of their past, and their lives seem just a little brighter, and easier to handle once they open up to each other. Though, Nastya knows of Josh’s past, he’s still in the dark as to why she is the way she is – what happened to her hand – why does she feel the need to dress the way she does? When she’s around him most every night it’s like she’s a whole other person.
Katja Millay weaves a beautiful, yet tragic story of two young people dealing with things that no one their age should have too – I cried….. and cried some more. And now, listening to the audiobook I’m excited to be back in their lives, reliving their story…. and I know, this book will be on repeat for quite some time.